5 Steps to Take Before Filing for Divorce

Deciding to file for divorce is often incredibly difficult, laden with mixed emotions and uncertainties. However, once you have reached this decision, there are several important steps that should be taken before officially filing for divorce. These actions can help set you up for a smoother and more successful divorce process.

#1. Organize Your Finances

Before you file for divorce, it's critical to get a clear picture of your financial situation. You should be familiar with all your joint and individual assets, including bank accounts, investments, real estate, and personal property. Also, be aware of all debts, loans, and credit card balances. Creating a comprehensive list of these will help the equitable division of assets and liabilities.

Here are a few steps you can take to start organizing your finances:

  • Make a note of all the savings and checking accounts you and your spouse hold, jointly or individually. This includes knowing the banks' names and the approximate balances.
  • Document all investments, including mutual funds, stocks, bonds, and retirement accounts, with details about which financial institution holds them and their current value.
  • Make a list of all properties owned, the date of acquisition, and the current market value. Personal properties of high value, such as vehicles, artwork, and jewelry, should also be on this list.
  • It's equally important to know about all the debts and loans held jointly or individually. Include mortgages, vehicle loans, student loans, and credit card debts, with details on the outstanding amount and the monthly payments.

Once you have all your financial details in place, you may want to consider opening separate bank accounts if you haven’t done so already. This will give you greater control over your finances and protect you from any financial decisions made by your spouse during the divorce process.

#2. Establish a Post-Divorce Budget

Divorce can significantly impact your finances, so it's important to plan for life after the divorce is finalized. You might need to plan for a single-income lifestyle and potentially increased expenses if child or spousal support is involved. Thus, establishing a post-divorce budget in advance can help you prepare for this new financial reality. Consider every potential expense, including housing, utilities, groceries, insurance, health care, children's education, and any other personal expenses.

Consider your income sources as well. This could be from employment, alimony, child support, investments, etc. It's crucial to ensure that your income can cover your expenses, or you may need to consider changing your lifestyle to fit your new budget. This might involve cutting back on non-essential expenses, downsizing your housing, or exploring new avenues for income.

Here's a simple way to start drafting your post-divorce budget:

  • Start by listing all your income sources.
  • Then, list every expense, breaking it down into fixed costs (like rent or mortgage, utilities, insurance), variable costs (like groceries, gas, eating out), and non-monthly expenses (like car maintenance, medical bills).
  • Subtract your total expenses from your total income. If the result is negative, you'll need to adjust your spending or increase your income. If the result is positive, consider saving or investing the extra money.

By taking these steps, you can develop a realistic picture of what life may look like financially after divorce, allowing you to plan accordingly.

#3. Gather Important Documents

The divorce process involves a substantial amount of paperwork. It's essential to gather all important documents that you might need during proceedings. These include tax returns, bank statements, credit card statements, deeds, car titles, insurance policies, and any other documents that could be relevant to your case. Having these documents on hand can save you time and stress once the divorce proceedings begin.

Here are some of the key documents you'll need to gather:

  • Personal documents: Birth certificates, passports, social security cards, marriage certificates, and any prenuptial agreements.
  • Financial documents: Tax returns for the last three years, recent pay stubs, bank account statements, investment account statements, retirement account statements, and any documentation relating to debts.
  • Property documents: Deeds, mortgage documents, car titles, and other documents showing ownership of assets.
  • Insurance documents: Life, health, auto, and homeowner's insurance policies.
  • Legal documents: Wills, trusts, powers of attorney, and medical directives.

Keep these documents in a safe and secure location your spouse can't access. It's also a good idea to make copies for your attorney. If you can’t find some of these documents, you might be able to obtain copies from your bank, your employer, or a government agency.

#4. Rely on Your Support Network

Divorce can be a stressful and emotionally draining process. Having a strong support network in place during this time is extremely beneficial. This support network can include family, friends, counselors, or support groups. These individuals or communities can provide emotional support, practical advice, and a safe space to express your feelings.

Here are some ways to leverage your support network effectively:

  • Communicate regularly: Keep your support network informed about your situation. Sharing your thoughts and feelings with them can be therapeutic, and they might be able to provide you with valuable perspectives and advice.
  • Seek professional support when necessary: While friends and family are excellent sources of emotional support, professional therapists and counselors are trained to help you navigate this challenging time. They can provide you with tools and strategies to cope with your emotions.
  • Join support groups: Interacting with individuals going through a similar situation can be comforting, as it reassures you that you are not alone. These groups can also be a valuable source of advice and information.

An important aspect of relying on your support network is understanding that it's okay to seek help and lean on others. You don’t have to navigate this difficult journey alone. It's not a sign of weakness to admit that you're struggling and need assistance. Reach out to the people around you – you might be surprised by how much support is available.

Lastly, take some time for self-care. Engage in activities that you love, exercise regularly, maintain a healthy diet, and ensure you get enough sleep. These actions can help reduce stress and promote a positive outlook, which is essential during the challenging divorce process.

#5. Consult a Divorce Attorney

Consulting a divorce attorney before filing for divorce is advisable. An experienced attorney can provide legal advice based on your unique situation, guide you through the divorce process, and protect your interests. They can help in different aspects like child custody, division of assets and debts, spousal support, etc. Make sure to choose an attorney who specializes in family law and has a good understanding of the divorce laws in your jurisdiction.

When choosing a divorce attorney, don't hesitate to ask questions about their experience, approach, fees, and what you can expect from the process. Remember, you are entrusting this person to represent you and your interests. Therefore, it's crucial to find someone you are comfortable with and trust. After consultation, if you decide to proceed with divorce, your attorney will guide you through the next steps, which include filing the divorce petition.

At Nelson, Taylor & Associates, our team of experienced divorce attorneys is dedicated to providing compassionate and effective legal representation for clients going through a divorce. We understand that each divorce case is unique, and we're committed to providing personalized strategies that align with your goals and circumstances. Whether it's negotiating a favorable settlement, fighting for your rights in court, or helping you understand the potential long-term impacts of decisions, you can trust us to stand by your side each step of the way.

Contact us online or call us at (801) 901-7046 for a consultation, and let us help you navigate this difficult time.